Is unhealthy Anger destroying your relationship with a loved one?

Do you find yourself screaming, yelling, throwing things, and or overly aggressive? Do you feel guilty that you are victimizing and hurting your loved ones in your life? Anger Management will help you regulate and manage your mood and help you create healthy communication.

Anger is one of the basic human emotions, as elemental as joy, sadness, stress, or disgust. These emotions are tied to basic survival and were honed over the course of human history. Anger is related to the “fight, flight, or freeze” response of the Nervous System; it prepares humans to fight. But fighting doesn't necessarily mean throwing punches; it might motivate communities to combat injustice by changing laws or enforcing new behavioral norms.

While anger is a normal, usually healthy, human emotion, constant or uncontrollable anger can be devastating. When out of control emotions turn destructive, you might find yourself facing problems in every corner of your life: at work, in your personal relationships, and in the overall quality of your health. For those who have always known that they have a problem with their anger, confronting difficult situations and emotions can make you feel as though you're at the mercy of unpredictable and powerful forces within. Perhaps you know why you react as you do, but perhaps you do not -- many people with anger issues feel like something just takes over sometimes.

Or perhaps you feel consistently taken advantage of, belittled or betrayed. Perhaps you are what some people call “sensitive” or even “over-sensitive” and you find yourself routinely feeling hurt, traumatized, or angered, but you have the social sensitivity to retreat rather than rage in public. Can an intelligent person who doesn’t scream, swear, or smash things have an anger management issue? Of course they can. Many people react to chronic anger by withdrawing socially, feeling chronically irritable and grumpy, or getting physically ill. Depression, anxiety, susbstance abuse, and self-destructive behaviors are all commons manifestations of "stuffed" anger expression.

The truth is most people who have problems managing their anger have experienced some type of emotional pain or trauma in their life. If you find yourself acting in ways that seem out of control and frightening, you might need help finding better ways to deal with this emotion. You are not alone in the struggle, however. You can learn "how to be angry”, rather than "not to be angry" or “how to pretend you’re not angry”. And when you are ready to do something about it, we have several ways to help you.

Of course, anger too easily or frequently mobilized can undermine relationships and it can be deleterious to bodies in the long term. Prolonged release of hormones that accompany anger can destroy neurons in areas of the brain associated with judgment and memory.

Everyone experiences anger at some point. It becomes problematic, however, when the frequency or severity of anger interferes with relationships, work performance, legal standing, or mental health.

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for Anger Management Therapy helps people control and reduce their anger by focusing on the present, and targeting only those problems that need to be solved. CBT for Anger Management involves cognitive behavioral problem solving, mindfulness training, and changing dysfunctional thought patterns.

There are numerous methods to identifying and altering dysfunctional thought patterns. Generally, they all begin with identifying automatic thoughts, those thoughts which provide a running commentary to our experience. Instead of accepting all of these thoughts as accurate reflections of reality, the cognitive therapist helps the patient to learn to think of these thoughts as guesses about what is really going on, and consider alternate points of view. In this way, the client is able to develop a more balanced way of thinking about whatever is causing him or unhealthy anger.

David approaches treatment for ADD/ADHD from a family perspective. The goal is to help the entire family to cope with these sometimes frustrating behaviors in a healthy and meaningful way. Play therapy, art therapy, and even physical movement may be used with the child. Coping skills and behavioral modification techniques (including the use of behavior charts and reward systems) may be offered to the parents.


LifeWorks AZ uses a strengths based approach in counseling. David believes that highlighting and tapping into all the gifts and strengths people have makes all the difference in creating the changes they desire in their lives. He also believes that it is vital to obtain balance physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually in order to create the desired change.

David's technique is unique in he works not only with the child he also works with parents in coaching, counseling, and therapy to create behavior changes in the whole family system.

David uses a wide array of approaches to create desired change: CBT, DBT, EMDR, Art Therapy, Sports Mental Training, Play, Talk therapy, and more.

For more information and a free consultation, call (602) 575-4030 or email David at david@lifeworksaz.com.

 

David Abrams

David Abrams, MAPC, LPC

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